Morning Musing - Football and Oklahoma

Good Morning guys,
I had today's morning post all figured out last night...
The guys at work challenged GTB to a football match so was going to share pictures and all...
But sipping my morning tea I decided to catch up on world news...
OKLAHOMA!!!....SAD
What is going on in America people...this is what I am musing about...
Like the country is imploding...
Storms, Fires, Tornadoes, so much devastation...Is this coincidence or what?
There is an argument on CNN comments pages about the disaster...talks of acts of God, atheism and all...
Who else is thinking this? Maybe the liberal policies, lax morals and all is giving God flashbacks on Sodom and Gommorah...I dunno....
My thoughts and prayers are with them especially those who lost loved ones...
The stories are so heart wrenching...

So let me share the pictures from last night's game...I stayed till 8pm and ran off...
I can not be shining teeth with people who live around the corner from work...
The score was 3-3 when I left but I hear it ended with a 9-5 score, the office winning...
I played cheerleader/coach... fueled by alcohol naturally...On an empty stomach...bad bad idea...
It was habit that got me home safely...

Oh the football field is on top of the office...Oyinbo people can maximize space sha!...
Great day ahead people...

How to train your Dragon

I wanted to title this post "How to train your Dog"  but lets stick to Dragon...
Hehehe...
Okay, so a while ago, a friend of mine was talking to me about her new relationship...
She was not too happy, I mean she liked the guy enough and she knew he liked her so what was the problem? He was not "behaving"...
So I suggested...You need to train him on how to be with you...
At this point can we just agree now that Men are a bit clueless...?
....that is why they need to be trained....

Who has seen the movie "How to train your dragon?"...
If you haven't seen it, a boy adopts a baby dragon...and trains the dragon to be loving not just zapping everyone about with tongues of fire...
So this is sort of a similar situation...
A man in a new relationship will most likely treat you how he treated his Ex...because this is his most recent intimate experience with a woman...
So if his ex-girlfriend was not big on romance and you are romantic to the core...you will be unhappy...
If his ex did not like going out to dine and you are a foodie who wants to try all the restaurants...problem...
What of if his ex likes a million mundane calls and you have stalker issues?
The list is endless...bottom line training...
This works both ways by the way, train your woman too...
I only speak from the perspective I am familiar with...
Now the hard part...Training the dragon and he does not know he is being trained...

Subtly...using all the feminine wiles known to woman and inventing some...
You can't just tell a man, Look I love receiving gifts or why can't you call everyday, take me to nice dinners ehn?
And please do not  compare him to your ex who called you tirelessly and flew you to the moon for dinner (after all, there is a reason he is the EX!!)...
Do not be a learner...
You must choose the right moment or create the right one...
Make sure you smile, giggle, bat eyelashes, blush (or apply blush), speak softly, whip your hair, whatever..hahaha (sounds like work? It is work...)
Carefully drop hints...and more importantly appreciate when he takes the hint or makes the extra effort...
I am not really good at this relationship thing but this is my 1 kobo...
Anyone else have suggestions and tips...Do share
Good luck...

Morning Musings - Friendship

Good Morning everyone...
Hope everybody had a good weekend.
I am back, Flu be gone...I am so glad...That whole sneezing and blowing of nose was not sexy at all...
I had a great weekend, brunches and dinners and I have pictures which I shall update the post with later...
So this morning I am musing about friendship...

I lost a good friend last year...
No she did not die...she just decided she did not want to be friends with me anymore...
Since I like to respect people's decisions, I let her be...
If anyone asked me how she was doing  including my mum, I always said oh she is great...even when I had not spoken to her in a year...
Why did she want to stop being friends?
In one word...MAN...
She had begun a relationship with a mutual friend...
They had a tumultuous and emotionally charged relationship, It was stressful even to observe and since we were all friends, I got caught in the middle a lot...they would each report the other to me...
It was beginning to take its toll on our individual friendships so I was relieved when they broke up...
But this was where the problem began, She thought I should  not stay friends with him...out of loyalty...
So she and I got chatting one day last year, I remember I was super tired, had just gotten in from many hours of flying and was saying to her I had spoken to him and so on....she lashes out...was just going on and on about "I thought you were my friend"...
Huh? Yea I am but I am also his friend...HELLO...
She was super enraged...so I zoned out, and left her rant...
She deleted me off Blackberry, Facebook but strangely left Twitter...
I am a peace maker but I was not in the mood for peace...besides Men do not do this shit...delete your friend because of woman...for what...hiss
So I let her be...

She called me a month ago...We spoke normally, like we never had the break of one year...
I had missed her wahala and she had missed mine...
That is how friendship works...
She may be an ass but she is my ass...
I am grateful God kept us alive to speak again...and make amends...
If you are mad at someone just because...It is not worth it...Give them a call...
Good morning...

Hey guys,
It has been a hell of a day...
My boss must really love seeing my face or really love germs because how else can I explain this?
Been sneezing all day, spreading this cold virus and the guy has not blinked and said "Oh N, go home and rest this cold out...
And I have to take a few days off soon so I can't be taking the piss and asking for today off...*sigh*
My Doctor friend say no matter how much vitamins I pump myself with now, it will only help me get through the day but this cold virus will take 2-5days to get out of my system...
Oh well...I will not fight this lying down...

How is everyone's day going?
I have a busy weekend beginning with post work drinks tonight (Had this planned before the Cold kicked in na...Judge me if you want...)
...I will stick to Juice , So help me God...AMEN
Then family wedding planning, Atinuke's birthday, all sorts...
I will do some resting when I can...

PS - Please do not mind this super colourful background. I support my friends and the background is for www.flingnow.com. Have you "flinged " something lately?
You can use the site to see stuff you no longer want at reduced cost...
I am using them to sell off some of my babies AKA books...
No I love my books, I want to sell the paperbacks and replace with hardback so they last longer on the shelves...
Side notes - I am quite pleased with myself, Now I know how to add pictures as background, I hated the boring background I had so now i will switch it up when I feel like...

anyhow, I wish you all a great weekend and next week I hope to be back and share what I mused/discussed this week...bisous

Flu

FLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!
Not laziness...All week I have been saying I feel off...well know I know why now...
Woke up feeling groggy, Tired and with blocked nostrils...
Quiet day, Not in the mood for much...
Downed Berocca tablet dissolved in warm water and sipping mugs of tea...
Hope everyone is having a better day...
Hoping I shall be better tomorrow...
I have a super busy weekend...This Cold needs to be gone!

Picture Post - Today...Lunch at Terra Kulture.

Hello guys....Apologies for not blogging yesterday...
No excuses, Just plain old Laziness and lots of work...
But I have a few blog post ideas o...things that i have been thinking about...maybe I will do a quick post later today...we will see...
For today let us stick to pictures...
Just got in from fantastic lunch with Didi...
Healthy friends = Healthy weight...#dazall
No need to be hanging around pounded yam chowing friends these days...or friends with absurd metabolisms...ordering milkshakes and fries up and down but still stay skinny...you lie...hahahaha

YUMMYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ermm friends shall we progress from cropped photos of you guys to proper pictures?
Don't worry, I will make sure you approve it before it goes up..hehe
Do you guys mind? You know yaselfs...
You know I have manners, I have to ask...
But Y'all always look nice na...
So to be or not to be?

Hope everyone is having a great day...

This weekend...

If I did not take Friday off...I would have had taken the day off...
My level of "off-ness" today is on another level....
Been trying to reboot my brain...
So why am I so tired?
In one word "ARIK"...
I went to visit family this weekend in Port Harcourt
Flight into Port Harcourt was uneventful...Took off about 30 minutes late which is a miracle by the way, still landed and made it into town in good time...
My drive into Port Harcourt though...What is up with Rivers state...wow...slowly retrogressing back to Village life...(I wish I took my Camera along. shameful)
The roads were horrendous, gully erosion eating into it, all sorts of developments right beside a road that should be an expressway, dilapidated buildings...as in wow...
This from a state where the Government flies about in a Private Jet...Unbelievable...
God helps our country...

I have always visited Port Harcourt...
I haven't been in two years but growing up I went every year with my siblings..
PH was fun...oil money was flowing like mad..
We used to play a game...Name the car...for every five cars that zoomed past, two were luxury cars...
We spent the days leisurely swimming and riding bikes in the Shell Residential Area daydreaming of marrying an oil big boy so we could glam up like their wives did when they came to get their children from school or when they came for lunch or whatever...
But MEND and the Kidnapping Saga ruined that town...
Now it is a shadow of itself..slowly getting back up I hope since I had a few foreigners on my flights...this was impossible about 5 years ago when the kidnapping was at its peak...
My family did not get spared, My aunties kids got kidnapped too...kept for a week in the creeks...Not fed everyday...
The driver plotted with the kidnappers on the school run...was tough times...
Then domestic helps were treated like gods before they "arrange" for you...

Anyway, was a great family weekend...
Headed out to the airport to catch my 5pm flight out to Lagos...
7pm and we had not boarded...
ARIK...Words fail me...
When we finally boarded about 7.30ish, some guy had misplaced his boarding pass and the crew was refusing him boarding...
Well He forcefully got on the plane shouting..."My name is on the Manifest"...haha...Manifest sha...
So the Pilot refused to take off and this got more people shouting...
One woman was saying if I miss my international flight out, I will sue...
If I wasn't so tired, cold, hungry and angry....I would have keeled over in laughter...
Finally took up by 8pm, a good 3 hours behind schedule....as in 3 HOURS!!!!
So yes, Brain refused to function today and I cannot blame it...it is traumatized...
Just going through the motion...I see the light at the end of the Tunnel...6pm!

So what did you all do over the wet weekend?

Mamma Mia

I had a very off day yesterday...so was not in the mood to blog...

I am still feeling a bit "off"today, my weekend begins today though...took tomorrow off work so maybe I will gather my thoughts and all...

It is my Mother's birthday today...

Mother dearest...Her Royal Awesomeness...

Growing up, My Mum and I were not very fond of each other...

I was definitely not her favourite child...

Now we are very very close...I mean we speak everyday and the days we do not speak she sulks...hahaha

She now declares I am her favourite child now...declares oh...to the other children...

It is easy to be her favourite, I indulge her...

We even plan vacations together...this is a MIRACLE...

I guess this comes with old age, You realize your mother has your best interests even if she is from a different generation...

She realizes you are an Adult now and can do as you please and so peace reigns...

I remember the days of "Your dress is too short, The back is Open"...and we would argue...

Now It is more like..."This your dress ehn" and I say "Yessss?" and she says "Nothing o, you children of nowadays...The dress stays on...

Happy Birthday Mother...

May your latter days be more fulfilling that the many years you have lived and may you always be glad in the children God chose to bless you with...

Love you deeply...

Today...

Hey guys,
I have not been able to blog today..busy busy...
But because I promised myself I will try hard to blog everyday...not for your reading pleasures alone, for discipline sake...(because I greatly lack discipline) and because i want to make everyday count when I look back at the year...
I will be like...oh this time in may this is where I was mentally...helps me keep track of my blessings...
So here I am, Taking a breather from work now before we all head out to a bonding session at Cold stone..
Haha...I know right...They could not have picked a better place...
I shall indulge even though I am sort of on a high protein diet...
Since I am not really exercising, I am limiting carbs to complex with one splurge day per week....
Sunday when I go to my family home to see my mum...
I mean c'mon, when mama makes well garnished coconut rice or her fabulous soups...How can you say NO? You just have to dig in...

Since we are talking about managing weight and all, Why is it that Nigerians just see you and say "oh you have lost so much weight", oh you have gained so much weight?
Who asked you biko nu? How does it concern you ehn?
I mean I went to an office once with my boss and the lady was saying oh you look like my daughter only she is fatter...God forbid!
My boss whispers "Why is she calling her daughter fat?"...I whisper back because she is mean...hahahahahaha
Oh my boss is not skinny by the way so had to be diplomatic with the answer you see...
But he tries...spends his lunch hour in the work gym...Working on his summer hotness I suppose...
So yes...I know everyone has been a victim of this...Nigerians just love to discuss your weight...
Nobody abroad ever mentions weight before someone sues your ass for "I dunno what"...then the psychological trauma, people have become Suicidal  Bulimic, Anorexic all sorts because of silly statements about their weight
Your tailor, your uncle, your damn gateman, driver, pastor, everyone just yapping about how "aunty you don add o", "bros your belle don dey big o"...
Ha...
I mean I get angry when I see comments about the radio presenter Toolz and how people just go on and on about her weight...
Let me tell you guys something...she is hot...It is only women that are sending all those stupid anonymous comments on blogs...
I mean she has a hips to die for and a flat stomach...whether spanx/body magic or not...(There is only so much spanx can do if your belly is like Yokosuna's own" so)....
The "poor" girl  is running to the bank, and you are sitting at your desk abusing away...
Catch fire...

Anyway me I am off to Coldstone creamery, I will indulge well well...
Then tomorrow I will see how I can make up for it...or not...Is it your body?
Deuces...hehehe

UPDATE : I did this post in such a rush because they were ready to go...I did not proof read, sorry to everyone who read it when it was a mess...
Berry Berry Berry good was my poison today, in coconut frosted waffle...YUM...
Also when i was looking for a picture for the post, I goggled "Fat"...and a pic of Kim Kardashian popped up, ah ah na...she is not fat, she is pregnant...na wa oo....

This Weekend...

Good Morning everyone...
Hope everyone had a great weekend...
I had a fab weekend...I love Lagos weekends...sometimes....
So what did i do?
Friday night...Terra Kulture and Rhapsody...
Left work sharply at 6pm but was supposed to meet up with friends by 7-ish so I went to Terra Kulture to read till then...
Got another book, "My Life has a price" by Tina Okpara...
Been wanting to read this book for a little while now so when I saw it at Terra was delighted...
Its a true life story told from the angle of the house-help...
Tina Okpara was adopted by Super Eagles player and his wife, Godwin and Linda Okpara and taken to France to be their help...
She was subsequently abused physically, sexually and mentally for years before she ran away...
She sued...they are currently serving prison time...
It is very Insightful...Get a copy and read...
Be careful how you treat your domestic staff...
They may be less privileged but they have the same God...and HE executes judgement swiftly on their behalf...

So on to Rhapsody....this much talked about place...I never go to a place when it is all the hype but then we figured early drinks and get out before the "air kissing crowd" show up...
Hmmm....
Let me just tell you that Rhapsody is a place you go armed with cash and card...
The menu was pricey...
We stuck to drinks and appetizers and we were fine but hmmmm.....In case you are hungry...May God be with you...
Saturday was supposed to be chill day but I went to see the V-monologues at the MUSON center...
Been wanting to see for years and BOY was it a blast!!!
The cast was SUPERB, the acting was OUTSTANDING, the stories deep, touching and Hilarious...
I can't get some images out of my mind...I heard the word "Vagina" so much I am desensitized...
Was such a great play I could have seen it all over again...(Charles Novia sat behind me, I must look out for his review since he laughed the hardest...)
Kudos to the V-monologues team...

I finally got the rest for the week ahead yesterday...Sleep is good o...
Today began on a sour note...I woke up grouchy but I think I am on track now...
I have read good news which makes me happy and gives me hope...
Now I in turn wish you all the best in the week ahead...
May the week be one to look back upon with Joy and Happiness...

x

Signs...

A few years ago, I was hanging out with some guy I really liked...
I use hanging out because I am not sure how else to describe what was going on...
One fateful day, we hung out as usual and headed back to his apartment where he proceeded to play Play Station with his friends for an extended period...
A few hours after, I was very hungry...and I could tell that this play station thing would go on for a while so...I headed to the kitchen and made myself some noodles...Just enough for me...
I came back in, offered everyone and was hoping they would say No since they were too involved in video games for us to go and find proper food na...
But he had a bit of the noodles, paused his game and had some...(so he was hungry too huh?)...
That was that...we never really got on afterwards...

A year later he called me and we got talking, he said to me...It was the noodles...
To him it was a sign...That I would be selfish...
Hmmmm....
Remember this was say 7 years ago so I was quite young and so I didn't see it like that....besides I never understand women who stroll into a guy's house and know where all the condiments and cutlery are...particularly when a relationship is not defined...
I was surprised...seriously was he was expecting me to prepare noodles for him and the four friends playing games?
Hmmm...that's deep

So I am pondering about signs...to him that was a sign...
Starving me of food for games was also a sign...
And there are always signs...Good and bad by the way...
God in his infinite mercy will not let you get into situations without giving you signs...
I have an ex-colleague who is getting married in June...her fiancee can call her twenty times back to back if she does not pick up...I told her this was a sign...she laughed it off..
Me that is not even a sign...that is a signboard
right there shouting BEWARE!...
Someone who tell tales...
A lover who never returns calls or you can only call at certain hours...
A forgiving friend/lover...
A nagging woman...
A man who hits women...
Someone with an unreasonable temper...
What signs are you pointedly ignoring?

Being a seriously spontaneous being and irresponsibly so I must add...I see signs and sometimes I tune out...
My saving grace is I have great recovery mechanism...everything is a lesson learned even when painfully learnt...It is tale to be shared and laughed about...victory or defeat...all is a tale...
But hmmm.....
I implore everyone to listen to signs...they will save a lifetime of sighs...
I will leave this post here today...
Cheers to the freaking weekend...

Morning Musings

Friday...* moon-walking*...
The best day of the week...hehe...
I mean when I step into work on Friday surely my bosses can tell this will be a day of faffing...
I can go from work to bar in a switch of my lipstick...so yes...they must know...
I remember the first time I came into work in ballet flats...
Someone asked "What happened to you"...I didn't get it , I was like how do you mean?
You mean this is your real height...hahahaha...douh!...

Today I am giving them the "roaring nineties" fashion...matching the music I have been listening to all week...Double denim...and heels of course...
For all my mouth, I think I will head home early...l sense I am coming down with something...Flu?
My nose is tickling, my mouth feels parched and in general I feel a bit odd...
I have been yawning most of the day and since it is not hunger...
I am now mouthing a prayer to God...I do not want to be ill...and gulping piping hot mugs of green tea
This may just be another quiet weekend, I shall stock up on books and have a lie in reading...

I am going to do another post before I sign off for the weekend...if i can articulate my thoughts...
Good Morning

MAY DAY

Good Morning all...Hope you all had a great worker's day...

Yes the rains put a damper on things but i cannot complain about the cool winds it brought...

So slept in late, then spent most of the morning watching Crime and Investigation...I love this channel I hate to admit...scary things are going on in this world o...

Headed out to a meeting at Terra Kulture...

I love Terra Kulture, I mean why has it been so long since i hung out there?

I only went for the promise of fast WIFI and a good place to have a serious discussion but I should go more often...the fresh fruit smoothies were heavenly, the small chops ( I had peppered Bush meat and sweet potato fries)...the ambience, soft music, good people watching...not forgetting the Library and the art gallery...I think i will head there after work today to unwind and just read...

Yes i am like that...One of my friend says it will be very easy to kill me if someone needs to since i never switch up the places where I hang out..hehe...well if I like it, why should I?

So I got the new Chimamanda Adiche Novel "The Americanah"...Woohoooooo...

Bought at Terra Kulture, This will be my weekend reading...Cannot wait...

The rest of the day was spent chilling with friends, went to hang with my friend, Taichi...

It was her Nephew's tenth birthday...

The things my eyes saw from small children "dancing"...hmmmm

Parents need to be more involved in what their children are watching...

Honestly I was traumatized by under 10 year olds rolling their "bones" because there was no waist to be seen...and gyrating their tiny backsides...HA...

Any child of mine that attempt this *BS* has a one way ticket to the seminary/convent...

I am now trying to get my brain back in Work mode...thankful that tomorrow is Friday...

On another note, Guys please follow the blog. 

There is a column on the right side where you can sign up to follow...

I usually post links for new post on BBM (Which I have taken a break from for now) and Facebook but sometimes I forget...or cannot be bothered to so following makes it easy to keep up to date...

Everyone have a great day...I will blog again soon when I have a moment...

x

The Swear Jar

When I joined my new job about a year ago, I was amazed at the amount of cussing going on...
I mean I cuss, not a lot i hope...I almost never say the F-word but i say shit, bullshit and variants...so I am by no means a prude but even I was worried...
I stomached it for a little while but when my first response to crazy driving on the road was "What the Fuck"...(this is the most common cuss-ing going on here at work)...I decided we needed an intervention...
Enter the swear jar...

So I come into work one day with a constructed box labelled "Swear Jar"...N100 per swear..and place right in the middle of my bosses work area...My office is open floored planned...no offices just work stations...
They all come in, see the jar and start laughing...
My line manager says "N, you must be kidding, I am Australian, I was brought up swearing...
I'm like yeah....I am Nigerian and it is rude to swear around women...so they all promise they will make an effort...
They did not...the swearing continued...and the money in the swear jar grew...we turned it into a game...
When someone swears, we looked them down until they put some money in...
Then they started coming in for work in the morning and paying up for a day worth of swearing....
Hahaha...imagine someone works in, puts N2000 into the jar and just goes on a swearing spree the whole day...
I gave up...
We broke the box and bought boxes of pizza for the whole office..even though i was thinking I should take all this money and run na...for my effort...hehe

Last week when we went to lunch...
We car-pooled....in my car...music is on...Kanye West "Ain't nobody fucking with my clique"....
They were like...WTF....You mean this is what you listen to and you were being sanctimonious on us...Hahahahahaha....
Douh...
Now its no hold barred, all day long cussing
God help us...

How's everyone's day going?

Morning Musings - Temper! Temper!

Good Morning everyone...

Hope we all had a good weekend...

I had a smashing Friday night...

Then just stayed mellow the rest of the weekend...

I did not blog Friday...Got busy and just did not have time to sit down and pen my thoughts...

So this morning, my boss is RED...Literarily...

Because oyibo people go red when they are angry...

I am tip toeing around him...He is yelling, swearing like a sailor (I will write about the swear jar later today), banging tables and generally in a state...

He came in a few minutes ago, one full hour late and in a mood...

I am hoping he directs all this energy somewhere else because I know if he says something off to me, I will speak up and ask him if all is well at home...

This must surely be some left over emotions from his house because nothing exciting has happened at work in the 30 minutes he has been in to make him this RED!....

I am now musing on how I always speak up...

I am not timid in the least bit, if someone says something off...I usually have to say mine back...or speak my mind...even if not immediately...usually with choice words...

I will tell you guys a story to end this morning musing...

In my last year in secondary school, My geography teacher and I had an showdown...

I had a migraine so had my head down in his class, he thought I was sleeping...so he asked me to kneel in front of the class...which i did...with my head down still...

If you have had migraines before, then you know even a sliver of light hurts so its best to have your eyes closed...

He gave me a heavy knock on the head for having my head down...I lost it...

I told him to take his bloody geography and go to hell...

Then I stormed out of the class and stumbled to the Vice Principal's office to report myself...

The Vice Principal was my mother by the way...
The shame...

hahahahahahahaha....Good God...

Anyway guys say a prayer that this man behaves o...because I may not behave ooo...

Good Morning people...Have a fab week ahead...